


Second Chances

by urisarang



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bisexual Sam Winchester, Cuddling, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Sex, Feelings, Fix-It, Fluff, M/M, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2019-03-07 00:10:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13422552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/urisarang/pseuds/urisarang
Summary: Lucifer has done nothing but bring destruction and suffering upon the world but it leaves him feeling empty and lost.  What does he have to show for all that he's done?  All the people he has hurt and destroyed?Lucifer has a mid life crisis while in driving the aging rock star and realizes he doesn't want to live like this anymore.  He wants something more, but he's already done so much harm in the world how could he ever hope to be anything else but The Adversary?He realizes the only way to fix this is to travel back in time to the beginning and prevent Mary Winchester from making that fateful deal.





	1. Chapter 1

Riding an aging rock star and finding no joy in the wanton destruction and mayhem that has been his go to for so long has left Lucifer wanting. Wanting something more, something he can hold on to during the lonely nights that populate his new found existence with no creator around to fight against. He feels lost, what is his purpose?

When he had told Sam that restarting the apocalypse was old news he really meant it. His time outside of the cage with Sam and without has shown him that there is more to God's creations than he could have imagined. They create so much pain and so much beauty, the world would not be the same without them, and surprisingly Lucifer finds himself unwilling to change it.

He wants to join in and add to the majesty of this world they have created with blood, tears and dreams, but he is outside it. The boogyman in the dark that haunts child and man alike. He would never be welcomed here, he could never make up for all that he has done to harm humanity.

He sees it in Sam's kind, but sad eyes. He knows his once fated vessel feels for him, but so much bad blood and broken promises between him. A gap the angel cannot ever hope to bridge. What is done is done, and he has committed the worst of sins against his other half. 

His other half that he can never hold nor call his own. Lucifer had burned that bridge with his own two hands then salted the earth with his tears. No, he does not deserve what little kindness and pity is in the other man's eyes when he gazes down upon the fallen angel. 

Sam reaches out a hand bravely to comfort his once greatest enemy and tormentor and Lucifer can't bear it. He lashes out sending Sam flying back. He doesn't deserve it, he won't let Sam hurt himself, he's not worth it. Not with all that he has done.

Lucifer cries out in anguish at the world his rage, his desire for revenge has wrought. He knows that his father had always meant for his begotten son to learn, to be better, to know and understand why Lucifer had to pay the price for humanity. Only it seems his son has learned the lesson too slowly, and already broken everything beyond repair for himself. 

If he could but go back, and do things different, if he could slap the rebelling child that he was until he listened. 

Oh.

He can. Lucifer realizes all at once what his father had planned for his first son. Why would Lucifer be the only angel who could time travel without restriction? Why would his father give him such a gift and not take it away once his son showed his true colors?

God must have known that his son would reach this point, and instead of letting his son live in the rotten world he had made he would be able to go back. To fix it, to make the right choices this time. Tears of joy stream down his face and he offers his first sincere prayer to the heavens in eons.

Lucifer turns to Sam who has been watching him with a weary expression during his break down. "It's okay Sammy, I understand now. I can see God's plan." The younger Winchester's eyebrows raise and disappear under the hair perpetually falling into his face. "I will fix this. I will fix all of this. I'll give you back the life you were always meant to have." Lucifer offers the man a small smile that seems to unsettle him more than comfort.

Lucifer pulls with every ounce of his being drawing upon all of his immense power to travel back. The world goes blurry around him as he travels back before Sam was even born. He stops when he finds the right moment to start fixing all his mistakes.

Before him stands Azrael as he makes Mary an offer she cannot refuse, an offer she cannot know the depths of which it will tear her family apart. Lucifer unfolds his wings in all their glory stunning her and the demon alike before the deal can be sealed. They turn to look at him; her eyes full of wonder and the demon with confused devotion.

Before the demon can speak his name Lucifer reaches out with his power and rips the demon out of John Winchester's body and smites it with a blinding flash of holy white light. Mary catches her husband in her arms as he falls lifeless. She falls to her knees clutching her husband close and glares at the man before her.

Lucifer raises his hands to show he means her no harm. "I can bring him back." Her eyes narrow in mistrust. "No catches, no deals. I'm an angel sent here to right wrongs, and more than any other family yours has been wronged. Let me fix this." She gives one tiny nod in accent no doubt not trusting his words but what other option does she have?

The arch angel leans over and places a hand to John's forehead and the light of returned life flows into the man. He gasps in a breath of air. Lucifer pulls his hand back and moves over to Mary's parents and brings them back to the world of the living. He shushes their lips and sends them into a slumber that wipes clean their memories of the last few hours. 

Lucifer stands and turns back to where Mary is holding onto her husband with dear life rocking him back and forth as he sleeps blissfully unaware of what has happened. She looks up at Lucifer eyes shinning bright with tears. "Thank you." She chokes out with a wavering voice. 

"Don't thank me, this is my mess I'm cleaning up. Heaven and Hell are warring with your family stuck right in the middle of it, but that ends now. I know you don't understand, and if I have anything to say about it you never will." Lucifer says voice full of conviction. "You left the life to keep your family safe, so if you want to thank me don't get dragged back in. We both know that it really isn't living when you're in the hunter life, don't curse your children with it. Keep them safe and ignorant of how ugly the world truly is. I'll be watching over them to keep them safe."

Mary straightens herself up and looks somberly into Lucifer's eyes as she promises to do just that. Lucifer, satisfied with her look of determination, nods and is gone with her next blink.

 

Lucifer keeps his word and watches over them quietly from the sidelines smiting demon and monster alike that come too close to his precious charges. He does not again make contact with them, he is content to watch from afar as the family prospers. Little Sam and Dean grow up together safe and secure in their home instead of traipsing across state lines unsure where they'll be sleeping next. They grow up with both a strong father and a loving mother giving them support and love.

Lucifer watches the boys play together, get in trouble together and sees their legendary brotherly bond grow stronger with each day. Lucifer has all of Sam's memories and to see how much more this little boy smiles is both heart warming and and heart breaking. The arch angel for the first time in his long life knows purpose, and the joy at having a place in the world. He can feel it down to his very core that he was meant for this, always was.

He understands more each day why his father had ordered all his angels to love mankind. Through the love and care of another he has found true happiness. Love begets love, care begets care. His father had loved and cared for all his creations who in turn showered love upon him. His angels could not know the joy of creation, but they could care for his father's creations. 

All along God was trying to share the wonder of purpose with his first children, and Lucifer had spit in his face. He was so childish and jealous, he had thought then that love was a finite thing. That if he gave his love to man he'd have less, not more. Those who horde love have less than those who give it freely, Lucifer understands this now. 

 

Time passes as the boys grow up with normal problems, such as Dean not wanting to go to college and instead choosing to move out and live with his rock band. Or when Sam came out to his father about being bisexual and his father all but disowning highlighted by tense family dinners with Mary playing the mediator. 

Lucifer knows there is no life without pain so he never interferes beyond sending Sam peaceful dreams after a bad day. The darkness in life makes the light stand out that much more. Sam slowly grows into the strong and defiant man Lucifer remembers as he faces his father's disappointment and resentment over his life choices. 

Sam gets the letter from Stanford and tells his mom who cries with joy at her baby boy growing up so fast. Sam is excitedly packing his bags when his mother quietly leaves the house through the back door. She walked about 20 feet off and out of sight before offering up a prayer. 

"You rang?" Lucifer asks while casually leaning against a tree. Mary turns to him startled at his sudden appearance. 

"I almost thought all of that was a bad dream, that I imagined you." 

"Aww shucks, you sure got a great imagination to come up with someone as awesome as me." Lucifer jokes with a bashful wave of his hand. "Seriously though, that was kind of the idea. Normal life and all that right? A ratty angel hanging out all the time would be hard to explain, wouldn't want to end up on a watch list for stalking kids now would we?"

Mary can't hold back a snort of laughter, she hadn't expect the guy to be so snarky. "So what did you break the 'normal' act to call me for?" Lucifer asks nonchalantly cleaning imaginary dirt from his nails.

"You said you would watch over this house, but will you keep watch on my boys now that they are both leaving?" Lucifer looks back up at her shedding his laid back air as he turns serious.

"Mary, I can promise you that there is nothing more important to me than keeping Sam safe. Wait, wait hold up yes I have been keeping Dean safe too, but he's not the one in danger." Mary's alarm at his words keeps growing. "I can't tell you what its about without endangering you and your family so don't ask. BUT the danger has been centered on Sam since before he was born. Yes it's my fault, and yes I'll continue to keep him safe."

Lucifer walks over to Mary until they are eye to eye so she can see his conviction. "I swear to you that with my last breath I'll keep him safe. He was, is, and will be, an amazing person and I won't allow anything to get in the way of that. You have my word." Mary is momentarily stunned by the force of the angel's vow. She opens her mouth, closes it then opens it again.

"And whose word is that? All I know is that you claim to be an angel, and alright I've never seen power like yours so maybe you are one, but what angel would have an interest in my son?" She questions the angel with a straight back full of the fire only a mother can have when protecting her child.

The light in the angel's eyes dims at her words, sadness creeping in on the edges. His proud shoulders droops just slightly as if weighed down by some unknown force. 

"Do you believe in second chances Mary?" He asks in a quiet voice, "Well this is mine. I can't tell you who I am, but I have done many horrible things. Things you couldn't even imagine, and I enjoyed it for a long, long time. Then one day I met someone and he showed me the light. He showed me compassion when I deserved contempt and-and I hurt him for it." The angel sinks down to his knees on the grass.

"Oh Mary, I ruined that kind-hearted man's life and at the end of it all? He still tried to show me a small measure of comfort. I couldn't save him, but I can save your son. Within him is the purest soul in creation and I would gladly burn for all eternity if it would keep him safe." 

Mary has more questions than when she started, but she can see that the angel won't be forth coming with any more answers. Faced with the raw emotion on the angel's face she has no choice but to believe in his sincerity despite all the unanswered questions. 

She extends a hand to the man on his knees before her. He stares at it for a beat in confusion before he grasps it and raises to his feet once more. She doesn't let go of his hand immediately and instead shakes it as if it were a first meeting.

"Hi, I'm Mary and I'd be honored to have you be my son's mysterious guardian angel." Lucifer lets out a surprised burst of air at the woman before him before he shakes back with a small smile.

"You can call me Nick if you have to call me something. I've grown fond of this form, so it's a good name as any." He offers in parting. He leaves as quietly as he came heart soaring at her acceptance. He doesn't doubt that if she knew who he really was that she would have agreed, but he doesn't let himself dwell on it. This is his chance to be someone new, to be who his father always hoped he'd be, to be someone Sam could be proud of.


	2. Chapter 2

If you asked Sam he'd tell you he's happy, that he had a great childhood growing up. He has his brother Dean, who has a bad case of the tough guy syndrome, and they'd clash heads more often than not since Sam is a total softy, but they love each other. Even if Dean's way of showing it is to call him a bitch.

He's got a great mom who has always encouraged his softer, 'girly' side as Dean calls it. His dad cares for him, even if its been rough for a few years since he came out to his parents. His mom always tells him not to worry and that his dad will come around eventually so he tries to not let it get him down. Hey, at least he has one parent on his side, that's better than a lot of kids who come out, like his room mate Cherry who got disowned by her whole family when she decided to transition into the woman she has always been inside. 

Sam got into the prestigious Stanford university with a free ride scholarship no less. He's loaded on the classes and is tracking good to graduate early with a perfect record. He has his mom to thank for his studying habits, she always stressed the importance of studying at a young age and boy has it ever paid off. 

Due to his free ride he only has to work part time at a coffee shop to pay for food expenses, and as his luck would hold he loves his job. There is something peaceful about working in a little coffee shop mostly full of students living off the caffeine to make it through school and nice regular customers. He even lucked out to get to work with Jessica Moore, one of his nice classmates who quickly became his best friend. 

Really, everything is going great, so of course he's happy. At least that's what he tells his friends when they bug him about being quiet for too long. He should be happy, everything is going his way, he's got no reason to feel like he's missing something.

And yet he is. It feels like spotting something out of the corner of his eye but when he turns its gone an it leaves him feeling empty. If he could just know what it is that he's missing.

It's during one post finals celebration where everyone gets way too drunk when Sam confesses that to Jessica, who must not be as drunk as Sam cause her eyes light up.

"Maybe you just need a boyfriend or girlfriend, I don't think you've had one since I've known you." She suggests.

"I haven't really had a real relationship before." Sam confesses drunkenly too loud and the whole room goes quiet.

"Wait, what?" Cherry pipes in from somewhere to the left. "But you came out to your parents, how'd you know if you didn't try?" Sam's cheeks that are already red from the alcohol blush even further.

"Well, its not like I hadn't experimented with kissing-boys and girls-but I don't know. I just never found anyone I wanted to be with." A chorus of awwws ranging from the 'how sweet' variety to the 'you poor thing' sound around him. Great he's now the center of attention.

"So....are you saying that you're a unicorn Sam The Man Winchester?" Dave astutely outs him causing Sam to bury his face in his hands and promptly spilling the beer he had forgot he was holding.

"Come on Dave, that's not cool and you know it." Cherry defends him while Jessica puts an arm around his shoulders.

"It's okay Sam, we all decide to do that on our own time, but maybe its what you're missing." Sam has the sneaking suspicion that he's the only one drunk off his ass after all what with all his friends so quick to catch on. "I'm not saying go out and fuck the next guy you see, but maybe you should try going on a date."

"Uhhhhg" Sam moans from between his fingers, he knew he should have stopped at that last beer. If he had stopped none of his friends would know he's a pathetic 20 year old virgin who needs setting up. 

"Come on Sam, you won't know 'til you try." Dave urges his friend knowing full well that Sam will cave under the peer pressure. "It's not like it'll be hard, you're built like a mountain. We'll find someone who'll want to climb you." He earns a smack on the arm from Cherry for that one.

"Sammy baby, you're a catch all around so ignore the vulgar idiot. I know we can find you someone sweet who'll appreciate and respect you." Cherry reassures Sam.

"Alright, alright fine! Whatever I'll go on a date. One date. Happy? Can we change the subject now?" Sam pleads with his friends who thankfully let him off the hook and return to bullshitting about things unrelated to Sam and his nonexistent relationship woes.

Sam is lulled into a false sense of security over the next few days when not a peep is heard from his friends about setting him up. He goes to the coffee shop and loses himself in his work of taking orders, making small talk with the regulars and serving coffee. Sam is one of the more soft spoken baristas where he works, nor does he have the fake customer service face vibe. The regulars all really take a shine to him for his genuine interest in anything, and everything, they bring up.

Sam's ingrained study habits go far beyond the school yard, he looks up and learns about anything under the sun that catches his eye. Despite his young age he can hold a spirited conversation with someone four times his age on almost any topic. Sometimes a customer will talk to Sam about something he doesn't know and he'll soak up their knowledge like a sponge then go home and research about it so the next time they come in he's ready for them.

The door jingles signaling that a customer has entered the shop prompting Sam to look up from the table he was wiping down. A man looking to be in his early 30's with short carefully styled dirty blonde hair and sunglasses walks in. He's wearing a black suit with the jacket left unbuttoned accenting the navy blue dress shirt underneath with the top two buttons left undone. Already the man is dressed like a male model fresh off the red carpet, but when he pulls his glasses off and Sam sees his baby blue eyes he forgets how to breathe.

Sam doesn't think no, he knows he's never seen anyone in person who looks this good. The man could have walked off the cover of a magazine. He has a strong jaw covered in a fine dusting of a 5 o'clock shadow that just works for the guy. The man's eyes sweep the room and fall on Sam.

Baby blue doesn't do them justice, its like gazing at the wide open ocean with the pale blue sky above highlighting the darker hues. His heart rate kicks up once he realizes the man is staring right back at him with an impossibly tender look. Sam feels as if the world around him has gone blurry at the edges and its just the two of them standing in a shared bubble of time. 

Something inside Sam's chest clenches then relaxes at once with those eyes focused on him and him alone. As if Sam is the only thing of importance in the room. Sam blinks and breaks the spell that holds him sucking in a breath too loudly. He realizes he's been staring, oh god was he ever staring, and his cheeks go bright red. The man's lips curve into a knowing smirk and he raises an eyebrow in question.

"Uh, sorry. Hi. Uh, welcome." Sam flails internally at the genius his mouth let out on auto pilot. Great. Sam straitens up from where he was leaning over the table while twisting the rag in his hands subconsciously as he fights his nervousness at being caught checking out a customer hard. 

"Um, sorry about that. It's just that, well you know." Sam wiggles a hand with the rag in the man's direction with a helpless shrug.

A small bit of pink can just barely be made out under the stubble on the man's cheeks, surely he must know how good he looks? Sam thinks, but then again Sam turns awkward as hell whenever someone mentions how he looks so he shouldn't judge. Great he's now embarrassed the guy after staring like a creeper all within one minute of entering the shop. Jesus Christ what a train wreck.

The man doesn't look offended, he seems pleasantly surprised instead. Thank God for small miracles. When the man laughs its not in mockery, its a sound of delight.

"Oh, it's alright. I was looking too you know." The man looks up at down Sam and honest to god winks at him. "Fair's fair and all that." 

If Sam thought he was blushing before, now he's gone full tomato. He drops his eyes unable to return the man's playful look, he's way out of his admittedly tiny comfort zone. He brings his free hand not awkwardly holding out a rag to rub the back of his neck. He looks back up at the man through his bangs.

"Yeah right. So that happened." He coughs in attempt to clear the awkward. "So what can I get for you?" He asks trying to reclaim a more professional mood. Skin crinkles at the corner of the man's eyes in mirth as he walks up to the bar and leans against it. 

The man's every movement is suggestive, the way he leans one side of his body splays his coat wide and stretches his shirt against his chest with just a hint of white skin peaking out of the top of his shirt. 

Right staring is not polite. Sam drags his eyes back up from where they wandered back to those dreamy eyes that don't break contact with Sam's hazel to even glance up at the menu.

"I'm in the mood for something sweet, and strong." His voice is a deep velvet, each word rolling off his tongue with deliberate care. "Got anything like that?" The double entendre is not lost on Sam, but he chooses to ignore it.

"How does a cafe latte sound? Any preference on added flavor? We have all kinds." 

"Surprise me, I'm sure I'll like what ever you give me." That's it, Sam is going to die. Maybe he's already died. There is no way some random hot model walked into this small chain coffee shop just to hit on him. Yup, he's dead but he's not sure if this is heaven or hell. Guess he'll find out by how it ends.

Sam turns around and gets busy with making the cafe latte. He adds dark chocolate syrup and just a dab of cherry for added sweetness. He steals a glance at the man who is thankfully preoccupied with playing on his phone as he considers what the mysterious male model would like. He takes a risk and adds a dollop of whipped cream to the top for extra sweetness to counter act the bitterness of the dark chocolate.

He adds a few artistic swirls to the brew for an added touch then turns back around and places the drink in front of the man. The man looks up at Sam then back down to his drink before pulling it towards himself and inhales it's rich aroma. Sam watches with baited breath as he takes a sip with closed eyes savoring the flavor on his tongue. The man sets the cup back down and reopens his entrancing eyes.

"Perfect." The man purrs and Sam soaks up the praise with a slight puffing out of his chest. He knows his coffee and he's always been really good at reading what people want, but he always gets filled with pride at a job well done when he makes a customer happy.

"Best coffee I've had in ages." The man continues standing up and taking his cup with him. "I'll definitely be a returning customer. Be seeing you around Sam." Sam startles at the use of his name, he doesn't remember introducing himself. The man looks down pointedly at Sam's chest. 

Oh, right. Name tag. Of course. Get it together Sam, one pretty face and he's forgotten how to human. The man flicks a hand out in a goodbye salute and turns around to leave. He looks just as good leaving as he did coming Sam thinks as his eyes rebel falling indecently low as he watches the stranger walk out the door.

The door swings shut and the man is gone. The room feels bereft without the man's larger than life presence. The lights seem dimmer now as if they too are saddened by the loss. Sam stares at the closed door and realizes the ache in his heart that he's had for as long as he can remember changed when he locked eyes with that man. Before it was always a hazy yearning for something more, but in that moment it crystallized. The shape of the hole in his heart has a form.

For the first time in his life he knows what it is that he's missing and he didn't even get the guy's name. Shit, real smooth Winchester. When Dean hears about this, which he will somehow with his magical older brother powers, he'll never let Sam live it down. 

Sam's inner thoughts are broken up by the door swinging open and for a split second a surge of hope floods his system that he might get a second chance to at least get a name, but its just one of the college regulars. Sam pushes down his disappointment and musters up a smile for the customer who shouldn't have to deal with a moping server.

The rest of Sam's shift goes by in a haze with his mind wandering when ever there is a quiet moment. He is man enough to admit a love for romantic movies and books. There is just something magical about reading or watching two people meet and slowly fall in love. Those ones are his favorites as he's always seen them as more real.

He never really cared for the ones where two people meet and fall in love at first sight. He always wrinkled his nose at those whimsical fairy tales because seriously? That's not how love works. Lust? Sure, but not love.

Now though? He kinda gets the whole instant connection thing. He ain't claiming that he's head over heels for some random hot dude, but neither is he claiming to not be moved. There was a spark of something between them and he felt drawn to the man despite not even knowing his name.

Yeah, okay the guy was smoking hot, but its more than that. Sam doesn't really understand it, but he thinks that it has to mean something that Sam wants to get to know the guy. 

Sam lets out a sigh as he closes and locks up the shop. Too bad he blew it. Dean would be ashamed to know that his brother didn't use any of his pick up techniques on someone who was obviously interested. He just let a total catch walk out without even trying, no wonder his brother always calls him a bitch. 

Worse is that a tiny little flame of hope is flickering within Sam. Maybe the guy will come back despite Sam's inability to handle flirting any better than a middle schooler. Maybe the guy will come back just for the coffee. He said it was good and that he would, and Sam wants to believe the guy. 

Sam straitens his shoulders and raises his head up from where he was watching his shoes on the walk home. Yeah, okay Sam can work with that. He decides that if somehow the guy does come back he'll actually talk to the guy. He did after all promise his friends he'd try, he just had no idea he'd be put to the test so soon.

Sam knows he's a walking disaster so he'll have to enlist his friends for advice on how to adult like and adulty adult. He's totally not looking forward to the good natured ribbing he's going to get from his friends when he asks for advice he had always previously ignored. 

Jess is just going to love this, she loves playing match maker and the added chance for a social make over will be the cherry on top. Sam smiles to himself as he pictures Jess running around the dorm like an excited puppy with a new toy. Well, even if the guy never comes back at least Sam will learn from a great teacher how to actually pick up people and keep them instead of just play with them like Dean does.

Sam is smiling with a new found hope for a new chapter unfolding in his life as he climbs the stairs to his dorm. He has a plan now, and he's great with plans. He's got this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a meet-cute. Quiet fuzzy feelings full of tooth rot NOT blatant flirting and sexual tension out the gate but.....
> 
> I was looking up reference pics for Mark since Lucifer may have warn the same outfit for 5 years in the show but I ain't having none of that when I stumbled upon THIS
> 
>  
> 
> [](https://imgur.com/STlOEl0)  
> 
> 
>  
> 
> Can I get a hell yes?! I take no responsibility, he's too hot.

**Author's Note:**

> Hurr durr durr brain derailed and demanded I write this instead of my other samifer fic...To be fair it's been kicking around in my head almost as long as the other one.
> 
> Ah well this one will be muuuuuch shorter, maybe a couple more chapters then my brain will let me get back to my monster ><'
> 
>  
> 
> Expect eventual sexy times(you'll know when I change the rating) and gooey, teeth rotting fluff because I need a break from angst for a moment. :D


End file.
